Thursday, February 21, 2008

Project Runway 4: The Reunion Episode

Jayne says: This was, by far the most snooze-inducing reunion special EVAR!! As far as we, the humble viewers could tell, there was no alcohol or pre-partying. WTF?! Traditionally, the reunion episode marks the one time where we get to see the designers cut loose and have a little fun, for crying out loud. No booze?!?! The resulting hour was exactly what you would think a bunch of people sitting around talking would be like...

Dry. Except for the video of Ricky's tearbox scenes...and Carmen's real actual tears.

Boring. With the glaring exception of Michael Kors's little laughing fit video, nothing actually happened. (Note: If anyone can find a video clip of his hysterical hyena-like laughter, PLEASE let me know. Holy shit, that was funny. His laugh made me laugh twice as hard. Classic.)

Jeff says: Yeah, I wasn't even planning on blogging this week as it was total a non-event. It was so clear that everyone's appearance was part of their contract. But let's recap the highlights:
  • Michael Kors's laughing fit. Last weekend we caught a shot of a 62 year old man's leopard print g-string over the top of his short shorts - my friend Dan and I were channelling Mr. Kors to the point of having to leave the bar we were in.
  • Christina smiling away while they replayed all of Ricky's crying events (snicker)
  • Nina Garcia's touched up face courtesy of Botox and Restylane, now expressionless and bag free!
Jayne says: I'm interrupting this recap to bring you the following rant: Why do I always hear about all the cool new face enhancement stuff from Jeff?! Damn it! Now, back to your regularly scheduled bitch-fest...

Anyways, I'm totally amazed at the amount of "Hey, you're fabulous!" ass-patting that went on. No one got pissed and walked off the set. No one went on a famously drunken aimless rant that perhaps would have made more sense had they been sober. For the most part, everyone just sat around and congratulated each other on how wonderful they all are. At one point during last night's love-fest, I seriously asked myself if the producers secretly replaced the alcoholic drinks with ecstasy-spiked bottles of water. ("Let's see if they notice!") Mass amounts of positivity ensued! It was a Project Runway reunion special first!

Honestly, I hope the boys have more to say here, because *damn*, I was just bored to tears. And in the event that the Jeff and Marc were as underwhelmed by this episode as I was, I invite them to create captions for the following pictures, because they are pretty funny...

Jayne says: "There once was a man from Nantucket..."

Jeff says: They sooooo want each other.

Jayne says: If Victorya was a super-hero, her special power would be shooting ice death-rays from her eyes, while ever so slightly curling her top lip in total disgust.

Jeff says: Condolezza Rice and Victorya: Separated at birth.

Jayne says:
Heidi: "There were jackets coming down the runway with no shirts underneath."
Carmen: "Bitch, I'll cut you, so help me GOD...Right after I finish being butt-hurt and needy...with this weird thingy on the side of my head. But damn it, I'm STILL fabulous!"

Jeff says: Hi Crazy Lady.
If I were straight she would scare the crap out of me. I mean can't you imagine what she would be like on a date, or even worse as your WIFE?!? She would be in the bathroom all insecure and obsessive asking you if she looked fabulous.

Next week: On to Bryant Park!!! Hollah!


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