Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Project Runway 4 recap: Episode 5

Dramasexual: an urban gay male with no clear sense of reality. Ex: "He spilled his cranberry Grey Goose and started to cry. What a dramasexual"

(Note: Jayne is on hiatus this week, something about a business trip to Barbados)

Jayne says: I so wish I was in Barbados. I am, however, on a business Las Vegas...for a day.

Jeff Says:
Gay guys and drama - like the holidays and shopping. Its a tradition and you can't avoid it. Just eat it and smile.

Case in point:

1. Jack got a staph infection - sure a staph infection is dangerous but you cant just call your doc and pick up some meds? I mean, if your gonna swallow you should know where your local clinic is at all times. Did we really have to talk about it on cam and then cry and leave? Sad to see him go because he did show some ability, wish he was leaving for the normal reasons, like sucking or pissing off your team member so they throw you under the bus. Hope you are well Jack, shame it ends this way.

2. Ricky in gold high heels with the requisite tears every 5-7 minutes
3. Christian.
4. Steven who so quietly panics. The mascot of shy-gay-guy-dramasexuals.

Marc says: I totally missed Jack's staph infection in the first few minutes of the show as I was racing home after injecting myself with a dirty martini at the Hyatt. Nothing like "gay penicillin" after a hard day at work. Will have to check out how they handled the whole Jack health scare when the show replays this week (too poor for TiVo here...), I just hope it was handled with taste since I had a feeling they would work his health into the show. I do agree with Jeff, the male designers this season are proving to be quite dramatic. High heels, tears, a staph this a beauty pageant??

Jeff Says: OK then. What was this show about? OH RIGHT - Recently slimmed down women, one for each designer, dressed in their now ill fitting favorite fat outfit. GOAL for the designers: re-craft a sea of fabric into something chic, personal, and not fat.

Marc says: Project Runway this week gets down and dirty and deals with America's second-biggest blemish, its weight issue. Perhaps a future episode will deal with the country's biggest problem, its foreign policy. How about having the designers work on outfits for Condi Rice for her next oveseas trip. I'm sure little Christian could come up with fun, frilly and "fierce" stuff for Condi to wear at peace talks.

I actually loved this week's challenge, it's always an unusual thrill to see "real" people walk down the runway. The same thrill I suppose could be derived from having the models walk down the aisles at a supermarket and exposed to food items. Heidi (love the hair) put on a brave face and in altruistic fashion, reached out to the average woman in this episode. I almost cried. Kors, I swear, is now not only applying self-tanning lotion but also drinking it. I don't care if he's orange, I love him anyway.

The Horrid.

Jeff Says: Ricky. I am still cracking up that he was wearing gold heels and his client's jeans all tight and shit. I mean really, a little Latin guy with a hookers hat, Capri length jeans and GOLD HEELS. How Dolce and Gabanna, right? So this was a nice look - if you are on The Real Housewives from the OC. I would like to have seen something not so DONE. Did anyone see what I saw when she came down the runway? Was the crotch of the jeans a little stretched out???

Marc says: This outfit is perfect for turning tricks at the local Holiday Inn while the kids are at soccer practice. Just make sure you park the SUV one block away, we don't want to be spotted by other mommies.

Jeff Says: Jillian. Yeah nice dress, but whatever. You didn't follow the instructions of the challenge, but maybe you didn't care since you were immune this week.

Marc says: Didn't Fergie, Duchess of York, wear this on "The View" recently? It's actually a nice little number. Well done.

Jeff Says: Rami. Another solid performance, I actually thought this was one of the better designs. And he is pretty hot, right? I mean I think so. Last week a friend of mine from LA says he has met him and he is packin'. DING! HE SO SHOULD HAVE WON - what a sham. OK maybe not.

Marc says: This outfit spells out S-A-S-S-Y and Ms. Thing proved it by sashaying down the runway. No more Kispy Kreme for this little lady.

Jeff Says: Steven. Oh dowdy doody, what are you thinking? You have the opportunity to really show your stuff and we keep getting such conservative looks. And this week it was not for lack of opportunity - he had an incredibly detailed (and shiny) size 71 wedding gown - it could have been a suit and a set of luggage for god's sake. Instead he threw it all out and used only 4 strips as trim on a dress that looked like it was from The Dick Van Dyke Show.

Marc says:
Now available at a Dress Barn near you.

Jeff Says: SweetPea. We would like to formally apologize for saying you had the acting range of Miss Piggy last week. Miss Piggy called to complain and asked us to retract. I think a more fair comparison is Tootie from The Facts Of Life.

The Fabulous.

Jeff Says: Christian. OK, it was nice (damn that hurt).

Marc says: Little Christian has talent. This "commercial" look works. Finally a design that doesn't look like it fell off the back of a Cirque du Soleil truck.

I seriously think that the biggest risk on the show is not Jack's staph infection but Christian's hair. Did anyone notice how Sweat Pea almost impaled herself on Christian's hair this week?? I was shaking.......gimme more "gay penicillin" now!

Jeff Says: Kevin. Wow this guy is so creative and can sew too boot. The unconstructed blazer-tent to bustier jacket was shear genius. His client was glowing and clearly loved it. I think I am rooting for him to the final 3 (with Rami of course)

Marc says: I hate leggings. There....I said it, I feel better. They work at the ballet, they work in the privacy of your own home, but they don't work in any other scenario. Let's start a movement to ban them.

Jayne says: I am currently wearing a pair of heather gray leggings with a black A-line dress. Until I read Marc's comments, I thought I looked pretty damn cute today. Apparently not. Thank goodness I can just run over the Shops at Ceasar's Palace and pick up something that might pass as nylons...

Should have won:

Jeff Says: Christina, I mean Christian. God, this sucks.

Marc says: I agree. Fierce Christian is the little diva that could.

Should have gotten the boot:

Jeff Says: Steven - no vision, no time management, worse than what Chris March sent down the runway. Sorry sugar, I'm sure you're very nice but nice don't cut it in the big city (unless we are talking about being nice to Michael Kors).

Marc says: Chris needs to go, again. Horrible outfit that had Kors referencing to French prostitutes (honey, you're not straight) and throwing up down Heidi's back when no one was looking. Thank god the only thing that came out of his stomach was Estee Lauder self tanner.

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Project Runway 4 recap: Episode 4

Jayne says: Jeff and I caucused on the way to work this morning and we agree. This week's challenge was a total snooze-fest. Taking an old fashion trend and attempting to breathe new life into it by making it relevant to today's styles is not only silly, but pointless too. With the glaring exception of underwear as outwear (HATE those statiny, lacy camisole tops!), there's a reason why people don't wear pleather, poodle skirts and shoulder pads anymore. I certainly don't want to see a revival of fringe or neon...although, and be honest, who didn't love them some Body Glove back in the day? I know I did. And while we're on the topic of bad fashion we're all embarrassed to admit we wore, where the HELL were the parachute pants?! Man, I rocked those as a fourth-grader! Anyways, on with the show...

Is anyone else getting tired of the team challenges? So many, so early in the season. Goodness...

So, teams of three, everyone's gotta do something with the outdated look they chose blah blah blah. The key here was that they had to come up with a cohesive collection. As far as I'm concerned, the only consistency in the collections was the amount of ugly coming down the runway. Beyond that, not so much. Let's start the show...

Jeff Says:
Personally, I think that most of the 80s was pretty bad fashion-wise, and last night it was all about the 80s (for the most part) and 80s style was recycled 50's and 60's looks. Really now, is creativity about recycling old styles into new? I am a trained designer and we were all taught about inspiration. Unfortunately, it seems that for quite some time now, inspiration comes from 25 years ago. Now, I am always up for a little Kid N' Play or Grunge style revival - bring on the greasy hair and neon suits!

Marc says: I was bored. The clothes were boring, the staged tensions between the designers were boring. Where are the styles and the personalities that have stood out in past seasons? There is something deeply freakish and disturbing about this season's cast, from Christian's "Benji in a blender look" to Sweet Pea's "Ms. Piggy in a hostage crisis" facial expressions.

I simply find myself counting the minutes until we can get to Michael Kors's fabulous one liners. The man should be writing a comeback sitcom for Delta Burke as well as designing caftans for her. Donna Karan pulled herself away last night from her frantic schedule of running an international fashion empire and designing custom pillow cases for Barbra Streisand to assist Nina and Michael in judging the designers. Donna's found peace in her life through hosting yoga workshops in her backyard in the Hamptons, and it's obvious by the way she talks about clothes...."it didn't flow"....."it had no relationship to the body." That is exactly what I tell sales people in stores when I'm shopping for an outfit, "I need to find something that will have a relationship to my body." Nothing strange with that.

The Horrid:

Jayne says: Oh my god. What the HELL is this?! I see no neon, no actual cutouts and no underwear as outerwear. I can't even try to be clever here in my critique of this "collection". It just sucks. All of you: FAIL.

Jeff says: "Hey - its En Vogue! I love your music! *never gonna get, no youre never gonna get it* Sweet! Oh, wait... you're different nationalities so then...... you are....... why are you......wearing"

So these dresses are the products of Ricky, Victorya, and Elisa. Really, they are all not very creative. The dynamic between Ricky and Victorya was pretty ugly and actually I really lost a lot of resepect for Victorya. After last night she's right down there with Christian on my list of PR people I love to hate. AND SPEAKING OF CHRISTIAN did you see him twirling in front of the mirror in his own creation? I mean can't you just imagine what he was like at age 10? I bet he had ALL kinds of Barbies. Right?

Marc says: These three desses are guaranteed to get you kicked off a Southwest flight. That's reason enough to buy them.

Jayne says: Ok, here's the thing...I keep going back to these two looks, racking my brains to see if I can remember what outdated trend Kit and Jack were supposed to update. It's interesting to me that just by looking at them, you can't tell. Besides the mish-mash of prints and the maternity tent, I honestly have no idea what these were supposed to be. Both of you: FAIL.

Jeff says: Yeah, this is pretty awful as well but at least its somewhat imaginative in comparison to the previous collection designed for En Vogue. But again, no self-respecting fashionista would be caught dead in this, not even the suburbian housewife mall trash in South San Francisco. Not that there is anything wrong with housewives, ok? Christian was on this team, right? I recall that yet again he was in love with his effort and yet again it barely registered on the runway. He won't be in the finale.

Marc says: A baby doll over leggings? I don't think so. The second dress actually works in my opinion. I like the use of different prints.

Jayne says: Jillian, honey, even though you were part of the winning team this week, there is no way around the fact that this is just ass. Jesus Mary Joseph. FAIL.

Jeff says: Hey hey hey, we are gonna disagree, here - I actually liked this collection. The above is similar to what I've been seeing on the streets 'cept without the overall detail and I do love denim. I really liked Kevin's denim hot pants. The strangest thing happend to me this morning though - I woke up THINKING about the shorts, they were a great piece of work but only models and teenage girls really look good in those....and why the hell am I analyzing hot pants in my sleep anyway??

Jayne says:
Jeff dear, there are people that can help. Call me. (Oh, how you make me laugh!)

Marc says: Didn't Cheryl Ladd wear this atrocity in the Charlie's Angels episode "Women's Prison Rodeo Murder"?

The (sort of) Fabulous:

Jayne says: It's a sad, sad day when an outfit consisting of denim formal shorts and a top made of curtain material that totally channels Daniel V's orchid top from two seasons ago steals the show. A very sad day indeed.

Jeff says: Love this outfit. Again, its pretty unwearable, although the top is more so than the shorts. I was pretty impressed by the flat pleat construction mixed with the high waist line. VERY nice *goosebumps*

Marc says: Denim shorts and high heels. This look doesn't work on the runway or on anyone with any sense of taste. This look belongs in "Pretty Woman," not on Project Runway.

Who should have won:

Jayne says: Oh hell, I don't know.

Jeff says: Jillian's team. They got the challenge right. It wasn't the best competition ever or even the best PR, but they did a good job. Now that I think about it I've seen all of the winning looks on Three's Company reruns ...

Marc says: I agree with Jeff, Jillian's team, and yet it's still a poor collection. Nothing in this week's episode would sell in a store.

Who should have gotten the boot:

Jayne says: New rule: If you are in the bottom for two consecutive weeks, you're out. Accordingly, Ricky, consider your "in" an early Christmas present, cuz' girl... DAMN. I'm still bummed about my round-boy of love Chris getting the auf. Totally unexpected and WAY too freaking early. Damn you, judges!

Jeff says: Chris March was rightfully cut last night. OMG, whatthefuck shoulder pads, that nasty victorian wallpaper print fabric and dingdong headed leadership was the trifecta of failures. Ricky was in close here but I think that had he not worked so hard to reel in Victorya he would have been the easier target. I just got through looking at Chris's website and its a dragqueenafest - NO WONDER he liked his design! Hey Chrissy-boy: bad taste is great at Trannyshack on Thursday nights at The Stud, but not on the runway.

Marc says: I'm sad to see Chris go because he was so sweet, not a vulture like the others, but I must say he is better suited to designing costumes, not clothes.

Jayne says:
YES!! Any time the word "trifecta" can be used in a sentence, I'm all for it!

Christian parrot watch:

Jayne says:
I'm so over his sing-songy voice and pompous attitude. He's deteriorated into pure squawking mode now. It's been done before, dude. And done better. Can he go soon? Pretty please with sugar on top?

Jeff says: He is a domestic disturbance waiting to happen as his boyfriend will kick his ass at some point. Voted "Most Likely To Work At Wet Seal After PR4"

Marc says: Christian dates a weed wacker. That is the only way one can explain the hair.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Project Runway 4 Recap: Episode 3

Marc says: Week three had the designers feverishly making an outfit for Today show correspondent and former New York Giants football star Tiki Barber for $150. Tiki showed his rebellious and gay friendly side by indicating to the group that he wasn't afraid of wearing pastels and pink. A deeply courageous statement for an NFL star. Seems like the designers this week were more overwhelmed by this challenge than a FEMA crew in a Gulf of Mexico hurricane. There was no real glam to any of this week's outfits and the whole effect was pure vanilla.

Jayne says: I SO love the fact that the only person in the bunch who knew who Tiki Barber is was the straight guy. Hell, *I* even know who Tiki Barber is. I also know that he has an identical twin brother. It would have been fun to see the designers get a little more time and a little more money to create two looks for the twins. THAT, my friends, would have been a challenge!! Unfortunately, one menswear outfit seemed to be challenge enough. And rightly so.

Jeff Says: Mmmmmm. Tiki Barber. And there is a TWIN? Barber sandwich anyone?

Marc says: A very "icy" Ginny Barber, wife of clothes-hungry Tiki, made an inspection of the outfits being worked on, probably to make sure that her hubby wouldn't end up in an off-the-shoulder gown. Ginny chose to make her Project Runway debut in a little number that made her look like a sample girl in the deli section of a Safeway supermarket.

Speaking of deli cuts, hot male models this week had most of the designers salivating hard (expect for a few hetero males in the bunch). Elisa was the only one who didn't insist on undressing her model like a Ken doll on Christmas morning, the Project Runway new age spitter actually has the heart of an Amish debutante. Gross.

Jayne says: Mmm, mmm, mmmm, mmmmm, mmmmmm. That is all. (Oh, and...more men please. Kthanx!)

Jeff says: Tiki and Ginny? Where are these people from - a 60's Rat Pack cocktail party in Palm Springs? Ginny even looked the part, she was all kinds of FABU, just needed bigger hair or jewels. I cant stop laughing at their names here - maybe their kids are Dice and Maraschino.

Standouts of the week...

Marc says: I love this suit, simple and elegant. Perhaps not sassy enough for Tiki or butch enough for Madame Ginni, but overall, a well constructed outfit and a solid effort by Chris, who hopefully is over the fact Sarah Jessica Parker snubbed him last week. Hang in there Chrissy.

Jayne says: Man, that's a lot of black. Tiki likes colors. Tiki likes textures. And Chris gave him black. Lots of very well constructed black. (My god, his model!!! DEEE-LISH! )

Jeff Says: Helmut Lang

Marc says: Hmmmmm....Cary Grant in "To Catch a Thief"? Tiki would only wear this if he were reporting from a croquet match in Newport, or covering the opening ceremonies of the Gay Games.

Jayne says: So structured! So fabulously tailored!! Right up until you get to the neckerchief. That one detail ruined all my fantasies of Steven's model instructing me to drop and give him twenty. Loved the amount of cuff showing at the bottom of the sleeves, though. Strong showing!

Jeff Says: Hollywood Playboy from 1970 driving a Mercedes Benz 280SL

And now for the vomit inducers of the week:

Marc says: Sweet P, what on earth are you doing in this competition if you can't even construct a basic shirt, actually what on earth are you doing in this industry if there is nothing even remotely fashionable about that was nasty of me, oops. I don't see the potential. Carmen should have stayed.

Jayne says: Oh honey, good lord, NO! What Marc said. Werd.

Jeff says: Barf, hurl, blow groceries, de-lunch, nicole richie, ralph, the 3 finger diet..

Marc says: I totally disagree with this. Too safe, too Macy's. What I imagine as being chic in Des Moines.

Jayne says: Uh yeah, werd to Marc again. I thought this was too strange and out there...and not in the funky Elisa way that I'm growing to love, either!

Jeff says: I'm sorry, this was the uniform of the Castro gay-fessional in 2003. I don't even think Ben Sherman does this style anymore.

Should have won:

Marc Says: Chris's design was a little safe but was the only one that didn't stand out as being too trendy or looking like a costume relic from Les Miserables.

Jayne says: I liked Kevin's design. Homeboy made a shirt, pants, a tie, a vest AND a frikkin' pocket square!

Jeff says: KIT! Loved the cardi-blazer made of fleece. It was great and totally TV ready. Tiki would looked smokin' hot in it.

Should have gotten the boot:

Marc says: Dear Sweet P should have found herself forced into a cab by Tim this week. Carmen did sin heavily by faking a shirt under that jacket with that piece of fabric, but haven't we all done that at one point in our lives? And I swear Carmen made an effort this week to control her hair, the Bravo "good taste" censors must have intervened.

Jayne says: I'm not proud of it, but I have indeed wrapped my chestal region in a strip of fabric. It was for a dance number to "Tusk" by Fleetwood Mac in my 9th grade recital, and even then, it almost didn't work. Here's what I think: Between Ricky and his uncontrollable tear ducts, Sweet P's...umm, what the hell WAS that anyways?, and Carmen's rendition of my "Tusk" costume, the trifecta of crap was complete. I think it should have been a triple auf'ing, for no one look was better than the other. And for god's sake, would someone PLEASE get Lady Tearbox Ricky a Kleenex?!

Jeff says: Carmen, as much as I hate to say it. She was sooooo much fun to look at, great clothes, hair, accessories. Sweet P was a train wreck but at least her outfit didnt look like it came with a magic carpet.

Marc says: And finally.....this week I did find myself wanting to slap Christian. Forgive me.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Project Runway 4 Recap: Episode 2

Jeff Says: Can I tell you all how good it is to be back in the throws of another season of Project Runway? In San Francisco, watching it is part of the requirement to get city citizenship:

"Question 1: Are you a Democrat, Independent, or crazy? Select Democrat"
"Question 2: Do you watch Project Runway? Select Yes or No"
"Question 3: Do you own any white dress shoes? Select Yes or No"

Marc Says: Apologies to J&J for being MIA for 48 hours, as well to our dear public (I know you are out me). I had a massive chunk of turkey breast stuck in my throat and had to be rushed to a William Sonoma store to have the dry bird flesh pulled out with a pair of 100 dollar kitchen tongs. Bless the sales lady who saved my life and then gave me hot chocolate once a pulse was detected. Thank god it didn't happen on Black Friday, that's all I'm saying......

Jeff Says: This week my favorite TV actress, Sarah Jessica Parker, was the guest host and was on a mission to get a free design for her new clothing line "Bitten". She is so great and I love that she is so humble. You really got the sense that she just came on the to make friends (on her way to her next million).

Marc says: How can anyone not love SJP? America's No. 1 fashion icon. The woman who grew up on food stamps and now has her own perfume, sent a shockwave through the room when she surprised the designers. I have only seen a reaction of that magnitude twice in my life, once in Lourdes when a group of Filipino tourists spotted the Virgin Mary and the other was on a flight to Palm Springs when a very famous gay porn star sat in economy. SJP is sincere and truly does want to dress the "American" woman for less than the cost of a take-out lunch at Whole Foods. In reality, her clothes are like the polyfiber darlings at H&M, they look great on the rack and away from an open flame, but once wrapped around normal bodies they look like cheap halloween costumes.

Challenge: Design a garment for everywoman.
Catch: 15 dollar limit on materials.

Jeff Says: Does every woman really want to dress like Sarah Jessica? SURE. Do they? UH, no they really don't. I cant imagine Jessica would be caught selling a sweater set or matching short-sleeve shirt and capris.

Rami: No no no no no no - this looks like a maternity outfit. The hair makes it look like a maternity outfit for an alien. I really was impressed with his vision and execution last week and this was just so uninspired. Maybe he is one of those guys that as the conversation runs on you realize that there really isn't as much there as you initially thought. Again, I was really disappointed. Mr. Kors sure lit up when Rami gave him a little grin though - work it Mr.

Jayne says: Ok, in all fairness to this week's designs and designers, I haven't yet seen this episode. The lame hotel (Homewood Suites, a Hilton establishment, if you please) didn't have Bravo. But just based on the pic here of Rami's outfit, the top looks more like one of those smocks that hair colorists give you to cover up your real clothes before slathering multi-faceted goo on your locks. I am, however, willing to reserve my judgments until I see the episode...

Jeff Says: I think I am warming up to the decision to cast Christian for season 4 as he is really full of himself. Fixin' his parrot hairdo on camera. Using the words "fierce" and "great" about his own design. Calling the other contestants things like "lame" and "losers".

Even better... when this nasty ass American Apparel knock-off dress and doesn't-go-with-jacket from his Dynasty design book took him one step away from getting auf'ed. Best moment in the season so far 'cause he just looked like he was gonna CRY.

Elisa: Girl, you're a freak. Please stop using the word IMBUE or I'm gonna poke out my ear drums. Please don't stop listening to your peers and Tim Gunn. Although your original sketch looked nothing like the final design IT WAS GORGEOUS. Did I say gorgeous? 'Cause it was - you know - GORGEOUS. Great colors and mix of textures. Hot length. Great use of skin and lines without being body conscious. Sweet a-line sleeves gathered at the bottom. Just amazing.

I called Elisa's outfit gorgeous right?

Jayne says: Again, haven't seen the episode, but I hope that this felt...thing? not as stiff-looking coming down the runway as it is in that pic. And, for god's sake, is that a (*gulp*) poncho? A fucking PONCHO?!? Honey, NO! Like I said, I'm willing to try to suppress the brain aneurysm until I see it in motion, but the Manolo taught me well, kids...friends don't let friends do ponchos.

Jeff Says: Side Note: here but did you catch the commercial at the 30 minute mark? It was for L'oreal Preference with Heather Locklear. How fucking old is she anyway? SHE LOOKS HOT.

Jayne says: I secretly want to be Heather Locklear. Bitch just refuses to age! Love her!

Jeff Says:
Should Have Won.
My vote goes for Elisa. Sure, the actual winner Victorya had another very sweet outfit. Cute detail and nice mix of textures, but I loved Elisa's look so much more..

Should Have Gotten The Boot.
As much as I dislike Christian on all fronts I do agree with the judges final decision for cut Marion. Michael
Kors described his outfit best: "Costumey", "Looked like something Pocahontas would wear" , " It grew 6 inches while on the runway". Too bad, I liked his personal style and thought it would translate to some nice work.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Project Runway 4 Recap: Episode One

Jayne says: Well, well, well. Here we are again. Jayne and Jeff, plus our new friend Marc. First off, I'd like to welcome you all to the new home of our little recaps. And we love Marc. You all will, too. YAY!

Ok, let's get right down to it. In the first challenge of Season Four, our designers were presented with a three tents full of gorg-e-ous fabrics and told they could use unlimited amounts of whatever they chose. Wait...a challenge with no budget?! What?! Part of the fun of past Episode Ones has been watching the designers flounder and flail around to make a garment out of candy, corn husks, and shower curtains. Not this time, though. Jeff said it best: If the designers can't shine when they are given complete and total creative freedom with no budget, they shouldn't be in the competition at all. Agreed, dear. The stage was set to separate the real talent from the riff-raff. And boy, there was a lot of riff-raff.

Marc says: I'm not exactly a bitch, I prefer calling it a personality with a strong edge....what I do hope to bring to this Blog is the perspective of a hardcore shopper and someone who gets high in stores from the smell of fresh merchandise. In general I felt the designs last night lacked a real sparkle despite the fact they were given great fabric. Some of the dresses made the models look like they had been pulled from a plane crash. This new crew of couture wannabes will need to focus more on the competition in the next few weeks and slack off on maintaining "Blade Runner" hairstyles and speaking to the camera like they're auditioning for "Days of Our Lives."

Jeff Says: I would also like to welcome Marc, he is a good friend and and the master of wit. I should add that it also helps we both LOVE the movie Towering Inferno ..

Did anyone notice how all of the ladies on the show looked like slight variations of the same woman? Only Kara Saun - whoops - I mean CARMEN had a real sense of hot...

Jayne Says: Dear Chris March, I WANT THIS DRESS!! Call me! I can even e-mail you my measurements! Divine, this was. (Note to the reader: please watch the re-runs of this show to see this dress in motion. It's heavenly and this picture does not do it justice!)

Marc says: I agree, beautiful design. Very simple and elegant compared to what others launched on the runway last night.

Jeff Says: We were all in agreement here. I called it Oscar De La Renta circa 1979, the tie on the back of the neck was FABULOUS... and the color.... to die...

Jayne Says: Aaaaannnnd now for the crap:

I know the judges oogled and drooled over this one, but honestly, all I see is a bad Burberry knock-off print with mangy fur glued down the front. I'm wishy-washy about Christian, but I HATE this outfit (and his hair! UGH!). I just didn't get it. Plus, if you have to constantly tell people how good you are, chances are that you're just not, mmmmkay?

Marc says: I was frightened by Christian's hair as well, he looked like a crow with morning hair. The dress looks like something you would wear to a "Dynasty" drag party. I think the judges probably have a better view of the design and the stitching than we do and perhaps see potential in Christian. What I see is a dress from the "ready-to-wear office collection" at Wal-Mart.

Jeff Says: Christian = UGH! You ever see the movie "Mean Girls" where the queen of the plastics gets hits by a bus? I was imaging that every time this little boy got screen time. Maybe his design was ok but I thought it looked kinda bad. The concept was there and that is what I think the judges were grabbing onto.

Jayne Says: Chris March. Rami's dress? Although stunning, too J. Lo.
Marc says: I agree. Loved this dress, super elegant. It flowed perfectly and actually would even work on anyone without an eating disorder.
Jeff Says: Chris March should have won - so hot (I have my trademark goosebumps!). Rami was hot proper, but his dress looked like some thing from Star Trek or maybe even Towering Inferno. Did you hear the way Rami said Silk Georgette? SWOON!
Maybe if I were Micael Kors I could vote for him ONLY if he agreed to come to my dressing room after taping...


Jayne Says: Simone. The judges actually got this one right. For once.

Marc says: Simone may be better suited for "Top Chef" based on the stitching and look of her little disaster. Bonne chance cheri.

Jeff Says: Simone. I used to sit next to a woman like her at work. She was nice but always came unraveled under pressure. Seems like this is what happened here - sorry girl.

At any rate, its too early to really tell who's got it and who's faking it. Catch us all back here next week. This promises to be another great season of our favorite show and we're all along for the ride!


Jeff says, "Coach is the new Wet Seal". I couldn't agree more.

Catch us back here soon for plenty of Project Runway 4 goodness!

Kisses, kittens! =)